Our Fundamental Vocation is to Love

Catholic morality should be understood in the context of our vocation to love.God created man in His own image and likeness: calling him to existence in love, through love and for love. Therefore. LOVE is our fundamental vocation. Two specific ways of realizing this vocation to love. single life ( virginity/ celibacy ) or Marriage. Marriage is the vocation of the Majority of the people.

Some terms:

There are certain terms we need to be familiar with when we talk about Christian Morality in Relationship.
CHASTITY : Living in a world with a growing hedonistic our mentality, we draw attention to the value of
Chastity, Chastity / celibacy is not a value to be witnessed  only by priest and nuns but all Christians.
Catholicism defines chastity as the virtue that moderates the sexual appetite ( Summa Theologia 1-11 q. 60 a. 5) . Unmarried Catholics express chastity through sexual abstinence.
Sexual intercourse within marriage is considered chaste when it retains the twofold significance of unity and procreation. [Humanae Vitae [HV] . 12)
CHASTITY as a moral virtue regulates the use of one's sexuality in such a way that the"I" can encounter the particular "thou" validly and lovingly, abstaining from sexual dealings will harm the encounter.


SEXUALITY: Sexuality is not something related only to the body, but something that affects the whole person
in the depth of his/her "I" is discovered. We have genetic and generic component of our sexuality, and Generic- affective and personal dimension.

What do couples pledge to the Altar?

" I . ..come before you  freely and without reservation [fully]....and I promise to be faithful...open to the children
that God wants to give us [fruitful]."

                *      Every sexual intercourse is a renewal of the wedding vows taken at the altar.

Spouses should always recall " How did Jesus-God Loves us?"

           *    Freely:  " No one takes my life from me, I lay it down on my own."
           *    Fully [Unconditionally]: " I give myself to you without reservation: body, soul and divinity"
           *    Faithfully: " I will be with you always, until the end of time."
           *    Fruitfully: " I have laid down my life so that my bride may have life and have it to the full."

Christian View of the Human Body

*      Genesis 1: 27, Human beings are created in the image of God

*      Dignity of the human person. God  created man in his own image and likeness (Genesis 1:27 ).

        Hence, body is the medium or sign that reveal God's love , power, goodness etc. therefore,

        body is very sacred.

*      In this context, the vocation and dignity of the human person should be clearly understood.

*     Mature sexual behavior comes from a proper understanding of the sacredness of our sexuality.

 *    Problem today- Morals have been corrupted, modern communication media only adds to this 

       corruption - influence of films, T.V. serials, print media and opinion polls.

*     We need to beware of the influence of   " Hedonistic Culture ".

*      The human person is sacred and not for use and abuse.

*      Sincere intention alone is not enough; life must be based on objective standards.

*      All our relationships should be guided by the universal norm of love.

*      The general and basic principles in this domain are: sex has a finality, which determines its morality.

 Mutual self-giving and procreation make up the finality. 

 This finality is preserve only in marriage. Therefore, genital sex is justified only in marriage and 

 consequently the use of sex outside marriage is immoral.

   

Respecting Relationship Boundaries:

Every human relationship is moderated by " relationship boundaries ". We need to respect persons &
their boundaries. The Church teaches that sexual union is permitted only in a spouses relationship, all sexual encounters outside marriage is immoral. 

1. PRE-MARITAL-SEXUAL RELATIONSHIP

Entered  by those unmarried or in preparation for marriage.
Why is Pre-Marital Sex Wrong?

1.  They behave as spouses before they become. Sexual intercourse is a  "typical expression",and unique to
     marital union. Hence to perform it they should be married couples.
2.  They distort and reduce the marriage commitment.
*   The decisive act of self - giving and acceptance is valid if expressed in a particular moment
     of time. ( celebration of sacrament)
     This commitment is not a private affair but has to be made publicly.
3.  They point to a false language.
*   Sexual act  is a language which is deep and expressed between two married people.
*   Sexual interaction uses a deep and exclusive language. In PMS they use a language and
     do not mean it. Therefore, it is cheating. They give their bodies but not themselves.
     Therefore no self-giving. It is dissection of the person, they give their bodies but not their inner selves.
4.  They act intentionally against the procreative end of marriage - use of contraception.
5.  One cannot use persons, but only things. The sexual gesture is done without any interior meaning.
6.  Such actions leave in them a deep sense of psychological incompleteness.
*   whole person not involved.
*   develop a ' playboy  and playgirl psychology'.


For those preparing for marriage the Church would say: Genuine Love is tested by its openness to
make sacrifices.

II. Extra - Marital Affairs

Adultery can be Single or Double depending on whether one or both are married.
Why is Extra- Marital Affair  (EMA) wrong?

1.      The word given on the wedding day is a serious word. They contradict the significance of the sexual
         gesture performed with the spouse.
         Sexual gesture points to a reciprocal gift and interior union. Relationship with a third party contradicts it.

2.     Sexual acts in Marriage expresses a fundamental option for the spouse.
        Extra Marital Act directly compromises two persons in reciprocal choice and self- donation

3.     It destroys the intimacy of conjugal dialogue and uniqueness of the sexual language.
*      Human person uses several languages. The sexual gesture is the secret language reserved only for
        spouses. EMA becomes a betrayal of the secret.

4.     Contradicts the basic respect due for a Human person.
*      Person unique and non- exchangable
*      We exchange things but not persons
*      EMA- people regard others not as person but as a partner.


How healthy would a marriage be if the couple were unfaithful to their wedding vows?